Jokes In Punjabi Funny for Facebook Images and Hindi Latest Very Funny In Urdu : April Fools Jokes Jokes In Punjabi Funny for Facebook Images and Hindi Latest Very Funny In Urdu

April Fools Jokes Defination

source(gogle.com.pk)

Q: When do you kick a midget in the balls?

A: When he is standing next to your girlfriend saying her hair smells nice

Q: What's the difference between your job and a dead prostitute?

A: Your job still sucks!

Q: What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree?

A: Hold on to your nuts, this is no ordinary blow job!

Q: How does a woman scare a gynecologist?

A: By becoming a ventriloquist!

Q: What's 6 inches long, 2 inches wide and drives women wild?

A: a $100 bill!

Q: Whats long and hard and has cum in it?

A: a cucumber

Q: How do you kill a circus clown?

A: Go for the juggler!

Q: Did you hear about the guy who died of a Viagra overdose?

A: They couldn't close his casket.

Q: Who was the worlds first carpenter?

A: Eve, because she made Adams banana stand

Q: Why does Dr. Pepper come (cum) in a bottle?

A: Because his wife died!

Q: What do you call a cheap circumcision?

A: a rip off

Q: Why did the snowman smile?

A: Because the snowblower is coming. One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Clause, "Please send me a sister." Santa Clause wrote him back, "Ok, send me your mother."

Q: Why is Santa so jolly?

A: Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

Q: Why doesn’t Santa have any kids?

A: He only comes once a year. Girl: "Hey, what's up?" Boy: "If I tell you, will you sit on it?"

Q: How do you get a nun pregnant?

A: Dress her up as an alter boy.

Q: Why can't you play Uno with a Mexican?

A: They steal all the green cards.

Q: Why don't orphans play baseball?

A: They don't know where home is

Q: What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit?

A: At least a zit waits until you’re a teenager before it cums on your face!

Q: What does it mean when your boyfriend is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?

A: You didn't hold the pillow down long enough. Boy: "Want to hear a joke about my dick? Never mind, its too long." Girl: "Wanna hear a joke about my pussy? Never mind, you won't get it."

Q: How do you tell if a chick is too fat to fuck ?

A: When you pull her pants down her ass is still in them

Q: What do you call 2 guys fighting over a slut?

A: Tug-of-whore.

Q: What do you call an anorexic bitch with a yeast infection?

A: A Quarter Ponder with Cheese.

Q: Why do they call it PMS?

A: Because Mad Cow Disease was already taken

Q: How do you stop a dog from humping your leg?

A: Pick him up and suck on his cock!

Q: What's slimy cold long and smells like pork?

A: Kermit the frogs finger

Q: What's a porn star's favorite drink?

A: 7 Up in cider.

Q: What's the difference between a bowling ball and a blonde?

A: You can only fit three fingers inside a bowling ball!

Q: What do preists and Mcdonalds have in common?

A: They both stick there meat in 10 year old buns

Q: What do you call a white guy surrounded by 9 black guys?

A: Steve Nash.

Q: Why can't Jesus play hockey?

A: He keeps getting nailed to the boards.

Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?

A: Kick his sister in the jaw.

Q: Why do men get their great ideas in bed?

A: Because their plugged into a genius!

Q: What do you call an artist with a brown finger?

A: Piccassole

Q: Did you guys hear about the cannibal that made a bunch of businessmen into Chili?

A: I guess he liked seasoned professionals.

Q: What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?

Q: A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

Q: Why was the guitar teacher arrested?

A: For fingering A minor.

Q: Three words to ruin a man's ego...?

A: "Is it in?"

Q: What do the Mafia and a pussy have in common?

A: One slip of the tongue, and you're in deep shit. A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, "I slept with a Brazilian...." The blonde replies, "Oh my God! You slut! How many is a brazilian?"

Q: Why don't black people go on cruises?

A: They already fell for that trick once. A daughter asked her mother how to spell penis, her mom said you should have asked me last night it was at the tip of my tongue.

Q: What has got two legs and bleeds?

A: Half a dog!

Q: What do you call an afghan virgin

A: Mever bin laid on

Q: Why does Miss Piggy douche with honey?

A: Because Kermit likes sweet and sour pork.

Q: What is the difference between an illegal immigrant and E.T.?

A: E.T. eventually went home!

Q: Why can't you hear a psychiatrist using the bathroom?

A: Because the 'p' is silent

Q: Why did God give men penises?

A: So they'd have at least one way to shut a woman up.

Q: What do you call a lesbian dinosaur

A: A lickalotopis

Q: What’s the difference between being hungry and horny?

A: Where you put the cucumber. What did the elephant say to a naked man? Hey that's cute but can you breath through it?

Q: What did One gay sperm say to another?

A: How do we find an egg in all of this shit?

Q: Did you hear about the celebrity murderer?

A: He was shooting for the stars.

Q: What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

A: Anyone can roast beef.

Q: Why did Tigger look in the toilet?

A: Because he was looking for Pooh If a firefighters business can go up in smoke, and a plumbers business can go down the drain, can a hooker get layed off?

Q: Do you know what the square root of 69 is?

A: Ate something If you had a donkey and I had a chicken and if your donkey ate my chicken what will you have? Three feet of my cock up your ass.

Q: What do you call a 13 year old girl from Kentucky who can run faster than her six brothers?

A: A virgin.

Q: What kind of bees produce milk?

A: Boobies

Q: Did you hear about the African American girl who was quiet during the movie?

A: She wasn't

Q: What do you call two fat people talking?

A: A heavy discussion.

Q: How do you start a parade in the ghetto?

A: Roll a 40 down the street.

Q: What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?

A: Slow down. And possibly use a lubricant.

Q: Whats the worst thing about dating a blonde?

A: If you don't know what hole to put it in neither do they.

Q: What did the penis say to the vagina?

A: Don't make me cum in there.

Q: Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?

A: They don't have balls to scratch.

Q: What do you call ball's on your chin?

A: A dick in your mouth!

Q: Did you hear about the Mexican racist?

A: He joined the que que que.

Q: What do you call a man who cries while he masturbates?

A: A tearjerker.

Q: What did the banana say to the vibrator?

A: Why are YOU shaking? She's going to eat me!

Q: Whats the difference between the Florida State football team and a Florida State cheerleader?

A: They both suck for four quarters. What’s the difference between a rabbi and a priest? A rabbi cuts them off; A priest sucks them off

Q: Why do dwarfs laugh when they play soccer?

A: The grass tickles their balls

Q: How do you rape a camel?

A: One hump at a time.

Q: What do you call a bunch of retarded kids in a pool?

A: Vegetable soup.

Q: What does a 75 year old woman have between her breasts that a 25 year old doesn't?

A: Her navel.

Q: What does a good bar and a good woman have in common?

A: Liquor in the front and poker in the back!

Q: What do you call a Spanish chick with no legs?

A: Cuntswaylow

Q: Why does the Easter Bunny hide Easter eggs?

A: He doesn't want anyone knowing he's been fucking the chickens!

Q: What's the difference between a hair stylist and a nail stylist?

A: One does hand jobs and one does blow jobs!

Q: What is the difference between erotic and kinky?

A: Erotic is using a feather....kinky is using the whole chicken.

Q: When does a cub become a boy scout?

A: When he eats his first Brownie.

Q: What is the leading cause in death with lesbians?

A: Hairballs.

Q: What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?

A: Wiped his ass.

Q: Did you hear about the butcher who backed into the meat grinder?

A: He got behind in his work.

Q: What do you get when cross a donkey and an onion?

A: a piece of ass that'll bring a tear to your eye!

Q: What does a woman and Kentucky Fried Chicken have in common?

A: By the time you’re finished with the breast and thighs, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.

Q: Why doesn’t Mexico have an Olympic team?

A: Because everybody who can run, jump and swim are already in the U.S.

Q: How do you embarrass an archaeologist?

A: Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

Q: What's the difference between a redneck and poor white trash?

A: a redneck will knock his sister up; poor white trash will marry her.

Q: What is the difference between snowmen and snowwomen?

A: Snowballs.

Q: What do you call a bunny with a bent dick?

A: FUCKS FUNNY

Q: What’s the difference between a Southern zoo and a Northern zoo?

A: A Southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage, along with a recipe.

Q: What’s 6 inches long and starts with a p?

A: ........... a shit (think about it)

Q: Why is being in the military like a blow-job? A. The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.

Q: What do you call a ninety year old man who can still masturbate?

A: Miracle Whip.

Q: What do hockey players and Surrey girls have in common?

A: They both only change their pads after every third period!