Saturday, 14 June 2014

Jokes And Riddles

Jokes And Riddles Defination

These funny riddles and answers are guaranteed to make you think, and they will hopefully make you laugh as well. A good funny riddle is one that provides your brain with a logical puzzle as well as using jokes and humor to tickle your funny bone. The puzzles and brain teasers we placed in this section have been selected for their use of irony, humor, and fancy word play to add an extra dimension of funniness to the puzzle being presented. It has been cited in many studies how beneficial solving riddles and puzzles are to the brain, both young and old, and adding a dimension of humor to them is a great way to make brain excercise more pleasant.

Note that dirty riddles are held to an appropriate, kid-friendly standard here at Here at GRN, we believe that riddles are a highly effective way to develop mental skills and understanding in young children, so we have worked hard to make our site a useful tool for school-age children. We ensure that the puzzles in this section are funny riddles for adults as well as kids, therefore, dirty riddles that would be inappropriate for children are kept off. Also not that these riddles may be easier than most, so please visit the hard riddles section for more difficult brain teasers. So, these are great funny riddles for kids and can be used in a classroom setting without worry. If you like riddles and you like jokes, take these funny joke riddle hybrids for a spin.
: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
A: Kick his sister in the jaw.

Q. What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?
A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball

Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?
A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

Q. What's a mixed feeling?
A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.

Q What's the height of conceit?
A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.

Q. What's the definition of macho?
A. Jogging home from your vasectomy.

Q. Do you know how New Zealanders practice safe sex?
A. They spray paint X's on the back of the sheep that kick!

Q.Why is divorce so expensive?
A. Because it's worth it!

Q. What is a Yankee?
A. The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

Q. What do Tupperware and a walrus have in common?
A. They both like a tight seal.

Q. What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common?
A. Their balls are just for decoration.

Q.What is the difference between 'ooooooh'and 'aaaaaaah'?
A. About three inches.

Q : What's the difference between purple and pink?
A. The grip.

Q. How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?
A. It's not hard.

Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
A: 45 pounds.

Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
A: 45 minutes.

Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
A: Breasts don't have eyes.

Q: If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love?
A. The swallow.

Q: What is the difference between medium and rare?
A: Six inches is medium, eight inches is rare.

Q. Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?
A .. They don't have balls to scratch!
What new crop did the farmer plant?
(Beets me!)

Why shouldn't you tell a secret on a farm?
(Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears!)

Farmers earn a meager celery, come home beet and just want to read the pepper, turn-ip the covers, en-dive into bed!)

What did the baby corn say to the mama corn?
(Where's pop?)

What is a sheep's favorite game?

Why did the cabbage win the race?
(Because it was ahead!)

Why was the cucumber mad?
(Because it was in a pickle!)
What does a mixed-up hen lay?
(Scrambled eggs!)

What does an evil hen lay?
(Deviled eggs!)

Where do tough chickens come from?
(Hard-boiled eggs!)

Why did the chicken cross the road?
(To get to the other side!)

Why did the chewing gum cross the road?
(It was stuck to the chicken's foot!)

Why did the turkey cross the road?
(It was the chicken's day off!)

Why did the turkey cross the road twice?
(To prove he wasn't chicken!)

What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
(An eggroll!)

A rooster laid an egg on a barn roof. Which way would it roll?
(Roosters don't lay eggs, hens do!)

Where do you find a chicken with no legs?
(Exactly where you left it!)

What do you call it when it rains chickens and ducks?
(Foul weather!)

What do you get if you cross a cocker spaniel, a poodle and a rooster?

Chickens rise when the rooster crows, but when do ducks get up?
(At the quack of dawn!)
What do you get from a pampered cow?
(Spoiled milk!)

What do you call a cow with two legs?
(Lean beef!)

What do you call a cow with no legs?
(Ground beef!)

Where do cows go for entertainment?
(To the moo-vies!)

What do you get when you cross an octopus and a cow?
(An animal that can milk itself!)

What is a cow's favorite day?
(Moo-years Day!)

What did the farmer call the cow that had no milk?
(An udder failure!)

What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cow?
(Roost beef!)

What happened to the lost cattle?
(Nobody's herd!)

Why can't you shock cows?
(They've herd it all!)

Have you heard about the cow astronaut?
(He landed on the moooon!)
Jokes And Riddles
Jokes And Riddles
Jokes And Riddles
Jokes And Riddles
Jokes And Riddles
Jokes And Riddles
Jokes And Riddles
Jokes And Riddles
Jokes And Riddles
Jokes And Riddles
Jokes And Riddles

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