Jokes In Punjabi Funny for Facebook Images and Hindi Latest Very Funny In Urdu : Hindi Jokes Sms Jokes In Punjabi Funny for Facebook Images and Hindi Latest Very Funny In Urdu

Sunday, 22 June 2014

Hindi Jokes Sms Jokes In Punjabi Funny for Facebook Images and Hindi Latest Very Funny In Urdu

Hindi Jokes Sms Defination

source(gogle.com.pk)

Words that you or I would commonly use for one meaning, have a completely different meaning to parents in a family...

AMNESIA: condition that enables a woman who has gone through labor to have sex again.

BOTTLE FEEDING: an opportunity for Daddy to get up at 2 AM too.

DEFENSE: what you'd better have around the yard if you're going to let the children play outside.

DROOLING: how teething babies wash their chins.

DUMB WAITER: one who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.

FAMILY PLANNING: the art of spacing your children the proper distance apart to keep you from falling into financial disaster.

FEEDBACK: the inevitable result when a baby doesn't appreciate the strained carrots.

FULL NAME: what you call your child when you're mad at him.

GRANDPARENTS: the people who think your children are wonderful even though they're sure you're not raising them right.

HEARSAY: what toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.

IMPREGNABLE: a woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.

Artery, n. The study of paintings.

Bacteria, n. The back door of a cafeteria.

Barium, n. What doctors recommend when their patients die.

Benign, adj. What you be after you be eight.

Caesarean section, np. High-rent area in Rome.

Cat scan, np. A search for kitty.

Cauterize, v. Made eye contact with her.

Colic, n. A breed of sheep dog.

Coma, n. A punctuation mark of consciousness.

Dilate, v. To live a long life.

Disaster, vp. What happened to the lady who backed into a propellor

Fibula, n. A small lie.

Impotent, adj. Distinguished, well known.

Labor pain, np. The result of a work injury.

Medical Staff, np. A doctor's walking cane.

Morbid, adj. A higher offer.

Nitrates, npl. A price cheaper than day rates.

Node, v. Past tense of knew.

Outpatient, n. A person who has fainted.

Pelvis, n. Elvis's second cousin.

Postoperative, n. A mailman or letter carrier.

Recovery room, np. Place to do upholstery.

Rectum, v. Nearly killed him.

Secretion, n. A hiding place.

Seizure, n. An alcoholic Roman emperor.

Tablet, n. A small table.

Terminal illness, np. Airport sickness.

Tumor, n. One more than one more.

Urine, vp. Where you are when you aren't out.

INDEPENDENT: how we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.

LOOK OUT!: what it's too late for your child to do by the time you scream it.

OWWW: the first word spoken by children with older siblings.

PRENATAL: when your life was still somewhat your own.

PREPARED CHILDBIRTH: a contradiction in terms.

PUDDLE: a small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes.

SHOW OFF: a child who is more talented than yours.

STERILIZE: what you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby's pacifier by blowing on it.

STOREROOM: the distance required between the supermarket aisles so that children in shopping carts can't quite reach anything.

TEMPER TANTRUMS: what you should keep to a minimum so as to not upset the children.

THUNDERSTORM: a chance to see how many family members can fit into one bed.

TOP BUNK: where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.

TWO-MINUTE WARNING: when the baby's face turns red and she begins to make those familiar grunting noises.

VERBAL: able to whine in words.

WEAKER SEX: the kind you have after the kids have worn you out.

WHODUNIT: none of the kids that live in your house.

WHOOPS: an exclamation that translates roughly into "get a sponge".

Lil' Johnny goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?"

Dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way. I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me Capitalism. Mommy is the administrator of the money, so we'll call her the Government. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you The People. The nanny, well, consider her The Working Class. Your baby brother, we'll call him The Future. Now go think about this and see if it makes sense."

So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what Dad has said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying and runs to his room only to find that his diapers are very soiled.

So the little boy goes to his parents' room. Mom is sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he looks through the peephole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed.

The next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I understand what politics is now."

"Good son, tell me in your own words then what politics are."

The little boy replies, "Well, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the People are being